Empty Speak

2006-08-10T04:13:00.000-07:00

Ah ha. I can blog again. For a while my blog just wasn't there when I signed in. But now its back.

Right. So.... lots to get caught up on I guess. First, we have a new war. eeeeee.... I have all sorts of thoughts and opinions on it, but I don't think anyone reads this anyhow, so I don't feel like going into it right now.

I am now working for a public policy research institute. Its been ok, but they don't really know what to do with me, so I've been wasting a lot of time.

I have to go now to audition little kids who want to be bass players. I've never auditioned anyone before, let alone in Arabic. How does one know if an eight-year-old has bassist potential? And the music school has set no guidelines, like how many kids I'm supposed to accept etc.

2006-06-07T23:12:00.000-07:00

Perhaps its boring when I post articles, but this one is just so horrifying. Its from Haaretz:

Last update - 07:28 08/06/2006

Court: Palestinian man can sue state over killing of family by IDF

By Eli Ashkenazi

Mohammed Abu Samra, a Palestinian from Qabatiyah whose wife and two children were killed by Israel Defense Forces gunfire four years ago, can sue the state for compensation, according to a precedent-setting Haifa District Court ruling.

Haifa District Court Judge Yigal Grill decided a few days ago to dismiss the state's request to disqualify Abu Samra's lawsuit. He said the suit did not violate the Intifada Law, which prevents Palestinians from filing claims for damages for events that took place in "conflict zones," and that the amendment to the law cannot apply retroactively to a case in which the evidence has already been presented.

The shooting took place on May 5, 2002, as Abu Samra, his wife Fatma and their children - Abir, 4, and Basel, 5 - were harvesting grape leaves near the Jenin bypass road. IDF troops were operating in the area at the time, and began firing toward the Abu Samra family when a tank chain broke, making a loud noise that soldiers thought indicated that the tank had driven over an explosive device.

The family was lying on the ground, but then Abir got up and was killed by a bullet to the head. Fatma died on the spot after being shot in the chest while trying to protect Basel, who was also shot in the chest. The firing and shelling continued for about five to 10 minutes until the soldiers came to the scene. Mohammed shouted that they had killed his wife and children. The troops ordered him to lie on the ground, stripped him, handcuffed him and threatened to shoot him if he said a word. They saw that Basel was still alive and gave him first aid until a medical team arrived to take him to the hospital, where he later died of his wounds.

Meanwhile, Abu Samra was still handcuffed in the field where his dead wife and daughter lay. He remained that way for five hours, when an IDF officer arrived, uncuffed him and apologized for the incident.

The Intifada Law, which was passed in 2002, prevents Palestinians from receiving compensation in areas of the territories classified by the defense minister as "conflict zones." Amendments passed in July 2005 were intended to minimize the ability of Palestinians hurt during the intifada to sue the state for damages. However, the state only announced which areas were considered conflict zones in February 2006 - after evidence in the Abu Samra case had already been presented.

"The state is not legally responsible for damage caused to the subject of an enemy state, an operative or member of a terror organization or anyone damaged while acting at the behest of the subject of an enemy state, or a member or operative of a terror organization," the law states.

2006-06-05T04:02:00.000-07:00

Things have been very stressful, but it all ok now. We had a concert Wednesday in Jerusalem, and not a single band member got arrested. Huge huge huge gaping holes in the wall, by the way. Security wall my butt. Then, Saturday, we had our big CD release concert at the Ramallah Cultural Palace. It wasn't full, but we had about 500 people there. It was an excellent audience-- really loved the work. The entire foreign community in Ramallah came, so now I am famous among them, and everyone wants to buy me drinks. After the concert, one of our fans threw a huge shindig for us in his garden with slaughtered lamb and all (and slaughtered chicken for me, very considerately). But I was exhausted (bass is hard!) and got drunk much much too fast and so stumbled home around midnight, with my dreams of experiencing real rockstar partying (ok, well, the Palestinian version at least) unlived. Then, today, I had to give a training to the higher ups here and in Gaza (love the video conference) on dilemmas, self-criticism and standard-setting within the humanitarian community. It went shockingly well, considering. So now I can relax, start going to the gym again, allow all those foreigners to buy me drinks etc. etc.

2006-05-27T03:49:00.000-07:00

So I feel the need to make a public confession about a humiliating experience. Yesterday, the South Korean film crew that wants to make a documentary on Turab showed up at my place. They had planned to do an interview with me and a couple of the guys since we couldn't get everyone together to do a rehearsal. I meant to hide the bass before they arrived, but they came early and I was still napping. So my debut on S. Korean TV (Thursday) will be with unbrushed hair. Somehow predictable. So immediately the producer saw the bass and was like-- oh! your instrument! play for us! I tried several variations of "no" all of which failed. So then I decided that it was easier to just play some crap and then maybe they would go away. So I played some crap for a really long time-- not music just pluckity pluck pluck, with the camera inches from my face, which I know will be horribly horribly unflattering. Then the guy asks me, "what happened in Ramallah yesterday?" with the camera practically pressed up against my nose. I said, "there was an invasion". And he said, "Can you play music that expresses how you feel about yesterday's invasion?" To which I said, no. I explained that as a bassist, I'm not so much about expressing complex emotions but more about keeping rhythm. I explained that I'm not really a bass player anyhow. None of this worked, and I ended up improvising a sad little pizzicato number on the spot in the key of G-minor. It was so embarrassing. And so manipulative! And obviously I should have insisted harder on not playing, but its surprisingly tricky with a camera shoved in your face. Made me understand reality TV a little more. I almost was going to make the cool missle (or seagull) sounds I can make on my bass and then top it off with some hitting of the strings with my bow to represent machine gun fire-- but I'm pretty sure that the humor would have been lost on them. I hope to god the whole episode gets edited out. I'm so embarrassed even thinking about it.

2006-05-24T22:46:00.000-07:00

From today's NY Times

Gun Battle Erupts During Israeli Raid
By GREG MYRE
Published: May 24, 2006

"Four Palestinians, including one member of the Palestinian security forces, were killed and about 50 Palestinians were injured, according to hospitals in Ramallah. One Israeli soldier was wounded when he was hit in the head by a rock, the Israeli military said."

Which is, of course, to say that three Palestinian civilians and one security force member were killed. Not to quibble over words. I do like the fact that Israeli soldier injuries also listed. 54 Palestinians shot-- 4 killed, and one Israeli soldier bopped in the head with a stone. I know-- stones hurt.

Don't worry mom and dad-- this was a freak occurrence

2006-05-24T02:49:00.000-07:00

Anyone want to come? Free tickets for anyone who crosses the Atlantic to attend. Or the Med. That works too.

2006-05-23T03:36:00.000-07:00

A South Korean TV station wants to do a documentary on Turab-- a really invasive sort of following us around with camera's reality-band approach. The problem is, they want to do it between today (Tuesday) and Thursday. We don't even have a rehearsal during that time. I think they should shoot it anyways-- they can capture us all at our seperate boring day jobs, teaching music, grocery shopping, not even thinking about Turab, me kicking B's ass at backgammon, beer drinking- maybe collectively, but probably not. I think it would make facinating TV. B is meeting with them now.

2006-05-22T03:24:00.000-07:00

My posts have been very political of late. Perhaps this is boring. Anyhow, mesh el-hal (the situation walks). CD sales going well (available soon in the States-- I'll keep you posted). 3 concerts in the next 2 weeks. Parents visiting (hooray!). I ended up driving all around Ramallah last night with M who took me out to patch up relations after a nasty spat over rehearsal times. We were listening to a new radio station here that plays American pop music, mostly from the 90s. It made us both wicked nostalgic. It was sort of jarring also to be listening to the theme song from Dawson's Creek while driving through Ramallah center. All sorts of colliding nostalgias in fact as we exchanged invasion stories as we were driving around (do you remember when there was a tank right here for like 3 months straight? etc. etc.) I know its weird to classify this as nostalgia, but if I'm completely honest with myself, it is. The invasions sucked, but they seem so unreal now and so unarguably in the past (that's right- no more of those!) that they have crept into this stylized realm of nostalgia for me.

2006-05-09T02:55:00.000-07:00

The US has decided to crush Palestine, and it is doing so with swift efficiency. Aid is cut and no bank will handle the PA's money under the threat of prosecution by the US, so no donations from anywhere can come in. I wrote in a policy paper last week:

Poverty rates have reached approximately 43%, and it is estimated that 15% are living in deep poverty, which means they are not able to meet subsistence needs. With the freezing of development assistance by some donor countries, these poverty rates are apt to increase rapidly. The World Bank projects that if reduced aid flows were combined with the continuing non-transfer of tax revenues and trade and labor restrictions, Real GDP per capita would decline by 27% in 2006. This would constitute “…a one-year contraction of economic activity equivalent to a deep depression. Under this scenario, unemployment hits 47 percent and poverty 74 percent by 2008. By 2008, the cumulative loss in real GDP per capita since 1999 has reached 55 percent.” According to the Bank, “The humanitarian impact of cutting donor funds and VAT payments to the PA will result in a deficit that will immediately reduce the PA’s capacity to provide services, pay salaries and ensure security.”

Now, a week later, the World Bank is describing the above scenario as "rosy". Really-- that's the word they used. The new scenarios are much worse. Meanwhile:
11:03 Four dialysis patients die in Gaza hospital due to lack of medication (Israel Radio)

2006-05-06T02:58:00.000-07:00

This is a report from human rights organization Defense for the Children International (DCI). Absurd.

May 02, 2006

Five-year old boy detained by Israeli forces

In the early afternoon of 17 April, 33-year old Samer Qabha was sitting with his five-year old son, Motaz, in his lap, talking to his neighbour in front of his house in the northern West Bank village of Tura al-Gharbiya. As the men chatted, they noticed an Israeli military Hummer jeep passing several times up and down along the street in front of them. Samer and his neighbour paid little attention to the vehicle - the sight of the Israeli army in town is nothing new. Israeli forces often enter Tura al-Gharbiya and surrounding villages ostensibly to patrol the Separation Wall which snakes along the western edge of Tura al-Gharbiya, cutting the village off from its land and from the 9,000 residents of neighbouring hamlets in the Barta'a Ash Sharqiya enclave.

On around the fifth time of passing, the Hummer stopped and three soldiers got down and started walking towards Samer. Pointing at Motaz, the soldiers asked if the boy was Samer's son and said he'd been throwing stones at the jeep. As Samer started to protest, pointing out that his son was only five years old, other soldiers appeared from an olive grove beside the house. As they walked up to Samer and Motaz, one soldier told the others standing there “That boy was throwing stones”.

To the horror of Samer and his neighbour, the soldiers announced that they were going to arrest Motaz. Samer implored them to leave his child alone, but one of the soldiers bent down and tried to pull the by now terrified child out of his father's arms. For almost half an hour, Samer argued with the soldiers that Motaz was only a child and that they couldn't arrest him. However, when it became clear to him that the soldiers were not going to yield, Samer told them that if they were going to detain his child, they would have to take him too.

The soldier in charge made a call in which, Samer assumes, he sought permission to bring the father along with the son. The soldiers then dragged Motaz from his father, shouting at the boy who started screaming and begging his father to help him. Samer tried to hold onto and protect Motaz, but his efforts only angered the soldiers further. They turned and beat Samer, separating him from Motaz whom they slapped and yelled at. The soldiers bound Samer's hands and blindfolded him before pushing him into the jeep, shoving Motaz in after him.

Father and son were transferred to the nearby ‘Shakeed' military base and placed in a downstairs room to await the arrival of an officer. After about half an hour, Motaz, who was shaking with fear, told his father that he wanted a drink. Samer asked a soldier to bring a glass of water, but when it came, almost an hour later, the water was so hot they had to leave it to cool before the boy was able to drink. A while later, Motaz said he needed to go to the bathroom. The soldiers initially refused to let Motaz out of the cell, but after a long and heated argument they finally relented and let Samer, with his hands tied, walk out of the room to the toilet, with Motaz clutching his leg.

Around 8.30pm, an officer came and told Samer that Motaz had been throwing stones at soldiers. Samer demanded that the officer show some proof, so the officer called another soldier over who, indicating at Motaz, promptly told Samer and the officer “This boy throws stones”. The officer made a phone call and told Samer that he would be taken with his son to Salem detention centre north of Jenin, where Samer would be made to pay a fine of NIS 2,000 ($445). Again, Samer protested, arguing that he should not be made to pay and that his son was merely a child. “Israel does not separate between children and adults,” the officer told Samer. “All Palestinians are terrorists!”

The officer left the room and, on returning told Samer that he and Motaz could leave now. He told Samer to tell all the people of his village that they were to stop throwing stones at the Israeli forces as they patrolled the streets. “This is the last time we'll warn you,” he said.

At around 9.30pm, six and a half hours after the soldiers had first approached them outside the house, Samer and Motaz were released from military custody. They were let out of the gates of Shakeed camp onto an empty road, and told to go home. However, it was not until 10.30pm, after a terrifying hour's walk along a pitch-black road at risk of attack from Jewish settlers or from being apprehended again by Israeli forces, that Samer and Motaz finally reached the relative safety of their home back in Tura al-Gharbiya.

Based on the testimony of Samer Saleh Qabha

2006-04-25T04:09:00.000-07:00

Things are strange here, hard to tell what to focus on. Went to a youth concert conducted by Barenboim the other day, and there were snipers on the roof. That was weird. Turab is having its CD release concert June 8th (all invited!) I think we should also have snipers on the roof, just to prove that we also are important and controversial. Except that they would have water guns, as we are also generally peace loving and playful.

Work still very very interesting, and yet I'm procrastinating anyhow. I'm doing that thing where I way over-research and can't get it together to actually write anything. On the other hand, I think I can prove that the US and Europe freezing development aid is actually illegal according to binding (not just any binding-- Jus Cogens binding) international law. Ta Da!

Turab's CD will be out in a week. Taking orders if anyone wants one. If anyone reads this.

2006-04-15T03:03:00.000-07:00

I'm such an inconsistent blogger. I suppose no one reads this anyhow. So-- back from a week in Cyprus with N. Was very lovely, but not as free of occupation and checkpoints as I had hoped. And, I was made to take my pants off at the airport in Tel Aviv before I left. And... on my birthday no less. Of course after a whole week away, everything was changed when I got back. It is now possible to take a bus from Ramallah to Jerusalem. First time since I moved here in 2001. Seems good, but in actuality is very bad. Its difficult to explain, but basically more land has been annexed.

New job is fascinatingly relevant. Massive fly-on-the-wall value, if also a fair share of panic over hell-in-a-handbasketness.

2006-03-28T02:08:00.000-08:00

I'm a working girl again. Thanks to Belgium.

2006-03-17T06:16:00.000-08:00

Things are back to normal. I think no one noticed this whole thing was happening, except here. In case anyone was worried- not kidnapped.

2006-03-17T06:07:00.000-08:00

Its Tuesday night, the 14th. I’m writing this from bed and am not sure when I will be able to post it, as I don’t have internet at home. Its been a depressing day, with all that’s happened. It feels like old times here again. Except different, as always. That doesn’t make sense, but sort of expresses what it feels like to live here—nothing changes except everything.

I was rehearsing with a friend when I heard about what was happening in Jericho. Now that I don’t have a job, I’ve become a full-time bass player. Its weird how I avoided becoming a musician in part because its such a hard lifestyle, and yet its become my fall-back trade. In any case, we watched the goings-on on Al Jazeera to a background of endless rounds of the ABC song played by a musical plastic worm belonging to the son of my friend. Strange polyphony of machinegun fire and happy children’s song. Then I went to record a voiceover for a pharmaceutical commercial. By the time I went back home, we started to hear about the kidnappings. By now, all the French in the city have been evacuated (damn surrender-monkeys). Things here are calm though. Earlier, there were Israeli invasions here too, I think to arrest people, but they are over now. And the British Counsel and HSBC Bank were attacked by angry shabab (“youth”). Now, we are stuck at home because of fear of kidnapping. This is something new for me. I am used to curfew, but this is different. I am sure that it will blow over quickly. After dinner, my roommates and I were in desperate need for wine, and I had to call Y to come bring us some, and for once he came through. So now, like all political disturbances, and I am going to file this under “snow day” and prepare for some time at home. I have rehearsals tomorrow, and have to teach bass to refugee kids, and I hope I can still do all that. Its fine, I think, if I get door-to-door service. And I have promised my mother that I will never put her in a position where she will have to plead to Katie Curic for my release.

Anyhow, the whole thing is sad. And I think that the people have every right in the world to be pissed at the Brits and the Americans for what they did today.

2006-02-13T22:41:00.000-08:00

From today's New York Times-- oh yeah, there's no way *this* will blow up in America and Israel's face... another excellent idea from our brave leadership.

By STEVEN ERLANGER
Published: February 14, 2006
JERUSALEM, Feb. 13 — The United States and Israel are discussing ways to destabilize the Palestinian government so that newly elected Hamas officials will fail and elections will be called again, according to Israeli officials and Western diplomats.

The intention is to starve the Palestinian Authority of money and international connections to the point where, some months from now, its president, Mahmoud Abbas, is compelled to call a new election. The hope is that Palestinians will be so unhappy with life under Hamas that they will return to office a reformed and chastened Fatah movement.

2006-02-12T23:36:00.000-08:00

I'm all resigned and unemployed now. What's the point of being young, stupid and idealistic if you can't quit jobs all in a huff over issues of vision and mandate once in a while? Right? No? Anyhow, this is from today's Haaretz:

Israel cuts Jordan Rift from rest of W. Bank

By Amira Hass, Haaretz Correspondent

While the international community busied itself with the disengagement from the Gaza Strip last summer, Israel completed another cut-off process, which went unnoticed: in 2005, Israel completed a process of cutting off the eastern sector of the West Bank, including the Jordan Rift Valley, from the remainder of the West Bank.

Some 2,000,000 Palestinians, residents of the West Bank, are prohibited from entering the area, which constitutes around one-third of the West Bank, and includes the Jordan Rift, the area of the Dead Sea shoreline and the eastern slopes of the West Bank mountains.

2006-02-11T04:06:00.000-08:00

I'm quitting my job. Feels good.

2006-02-08T22:54:00.000-08:00

Last update - 08:22 09/02/2006

Danish paper cancels plans to republish cartoons about Israel

By Asaf Uni, Haaretz Correspondent

The Danish newspaper that created a storm in the Arab world by publishing cartoons of the prophet Mohammed has canceled plans to reprint several cartoons dealing with Israel, a senior editor told Haaretz yesterday.

"We wanted to show that we make fun of everyone, not only Muslims," said Pierre Collignon of Jyllands-Posten. "But for fear of being misunderstood, we canceled the plan at the last moment."

2006-02-08T01:44:00.000-08:00

My friend writes (and then attaches)

Despite all my efforts to ignore this silly cartoons story. I am finding myself more and more provoked. So here is a rational voice that has also been provoked, from this side of the "clash of civilizations".

http://www.zmag.org/content/showarticle.cfm?SectionID=30&ItemID=9680
Secular Arabs Detest Hypocrisy Too
by Omar Barghouti
February 06, 2006

As a rule, I hate to generalize, but I’ll make an exception this time. It seems westerners simply do not get it. Editorials all over Europe have bellowed in unison to defend the right of publishing anti-Islamic cartoons as an embodiment of the untouchable status of freedom of speech, one of the foundations of the democratic, secular ideal that has informed the west since the enlightenment. Even some non-conformant writers, who chose not to join the no-obligations-free-speech chorus, merely highlighted the need for “responsibility,” “wisdom,” and other pragmatic considerations that ought to take into consideration, besides the revered freedom of expression, the just as sacred beliefs of European as well as non-European Muslims, particularly to avoid the current backlash. What both groups do not understand is that what most Muslims and Arabs are accusing the west of is hypocrisy, not indulgence in their cherished freedoms per se.
As a resolutely secular Arab and Muslim, I also share in directing this charge at western elites who either refuse to understand or are intentionally blurring the issues. To put it bluntly, would the west accept or tolerate cartoons which are anti-Semitic, novels which deny the Holocaust, or poetry which favorably evokes the Protocols of the Elders of Zion? This is the fundamental question that ought to be answered, above all others, I believe, in order to grasp where the problem lies. There are laws in most European countries which make it illegal to question the Holocaust, even in academia. What of freedom of speech then, or academic freedom for that matter? Clearly, rationality, sensitivity to the continent’s past victims of genocide, and a prevalent understanding of the need to avoid inciting racial and religious hatred at any price were allowed to trump, or at least delineate the limits of, the deeply held value of free speech in this case.
Must European Muslims fall victims to a similar genocide before their European societies recognize the need to extend to Islam the exceptions that others have enjoyed so far?
Henry Porter argues in the Observer (February 5th, 2006) that this freedom under fire should not be “reduced and watered down to pacify a value system that is thought to be less developed than ours, less humane,” concluding that, “We detest the relativism that weighs different beliefs as equal, simply on the grounds that they are sincerely held.” Relativism, one is led to believe, then, ought to apply only when the target is a value system that is perceived as “developed and humane” as “ours.” This duplicity is precisely what has enraged most Muslims, seculars like me included.
Of course coming during a time when the west is ostracizing Iran and pushing for its referral to the UN Security Council for allegedly intending to produce weapons of mass destruction, while not having the decency to even raise explicit concerns about Israel’s much more real and formidable arsenal of nuclear bombs did not help to defuse the conflict, to borrow a British understatement. No matter how much western democracies -- and I, incidentally -- adore their deep-rooted freedom, and regardless what constraints they choose to tame it at times, they have a responsibility to avoid double standards.
Can the west summon any sense of fairness and consistency to arrive at rules that can equally govern all instances of decisively racist or hate-inciting speech, irrespective of which ethnic group or whose sacrosanct symbols it may be directed against?
Admittedly, many Muslim journalists and intellectuals must answer the same question. Is it ok to publish cartoons and articles that are clearly anti-Jewish -- as opposed to anti-Zionist -- but not ok to accept others publishing anti-Islamic drawings? Of course not. Being the downtrodden hardly justifies being two-faced.
Although the international media focused on the anarchic, misguided and often offensive and violent expressions of outrage in several Muslim countries, most ignored the more civil, organized and still huge demonstrations and the myriad rational and balanced opinions expressed by many in the Arab and Muslim worlds. An interesting slogan raised in most protests from Jakarta to Damascus read: “We respect all the prophets.” While most Islamic clerics would defend -- as an article of faith -- Islam’s utmost respect for Christianity and Judaism, most have not been sufficiently, if at all, judicious or vigilant when confronted in the Arab or Islamic press with cases of bigotry which contradicted this code.
Tolerating or unconsciously adopting double-standards anywhere is an insufferable attack on the principle of moral consistency which ought to be upheld by every responsible citizen of the world at all times. If we can all agree that one ought not do unto others what one does not wish to be done to him or her in similar circumstances, we shall be on the right track towards a real dialogue of cultures that respects diversity and difference yet espouses the universal values of equality, human rights and freedoms anchored in the imperative obligation not to infringe others’ rights. It is our collective responsibility to inclusively and systematically set such obligations, which have always been inseparable from the very concept of right.
* An independent Palestinian researcher and human rights advocate.

2006-02-04T03:27:00.000-08:00

For once its good to be American here.

From today's Haaretz: "European leaders called on Friday for restraint as Muslims staged growing protests over the cartoons...The United States condemned the cartoons, siding with Muslims outraged that newspapers put press freedom over respect for religion. "We ... respect freedom of the press and expression but it must be coupled with press responsibility. Inciting religious or ethnic hatreds in this manner is not acceptable," said State Department spokesman Kurtis Cooper.

Major U.S. publications have not republished the cartoons.

In contrast, some European media responded to the criticism against the Danish newspaper that originally printed the caricatures by reproducing the images and fueled anger that has led to boycotts of Danish products and widespread protests...The State Department reaction "was a strong statement in support of Muslims around the world. It's a reflection of the concern felt by millions of Muslims and I think it will be appreciated," he said...Newspapers in France, Germany, Spain, Switzerland and Hungary have reprinted caricatures originally published in Denmark, arguing that press freedom is more important than the protests and boycotts they have provoked. One cartoon shows the Muslim prophet wearing a turban shaped as a bomb with a burning fuse...The Danish foreign ministry in Copenhagen said all Danes, except for two diplomats, have left the West Bank and Gaza in recent days. The Danish representative office in the West Bank was to be closed Friday because of the threats, a local diplomat said, and the situation would be reassessed after the weekend...Norway closed its representative office in the West Bank to the public on Thursday because of the threats, but said the 23-member staff remains on the job."

There have been reprocussions. Some Friench friends of mine who work for Kamandjati Music Association have had to move out of thier flat, because their cohabitation and Frenchness was discussed at the local mosque during Friday prayers. God Bless America...

By the way, the cartoons are stupid, no? Why can't this type of protest ever be triggered by something even romotely intellegent. I'm with the Americans on this one.

2006-02-04T00:36:00.000-08:00

My workspace is now a meeting table wedged in a hallway in the ministry of planning. Even that may be too conspicuous, so my new boss will soon have me relegated to home where I can "keep a low profile" all day long and no one will have to face my horrid foreignness. I'm not bitter, but why is it that people who return to their homeland (as my boss did after 40 years in the states) come with so much weird baggage?

2006-02-03T07:35:00.000-08:00

Its a rainy Friday afternoon here, and I'm sitting by the fire at Zyriab simultaniously working on 2 laptops. Feeling a little up in the air and upsidedown and whatnot. Politics, work, everything is feeling backwards. I have a new boss who thinks that its embarrassing to have a foreigner working for the Ministry of Planning, so she has asked me to start working from home. I can't say that this is a momentious step in my career, and I am trying not to be horribly insulted. She is Palestinian, but has just come back after 40 years, and is having some issues with authenticity. I am, obviously, not authentic, and should not be seen roaming the halls of the illustrius ministry. I'm thinking of showing up to work tomorrow with my hair covered, and spend the day looking with repentence at the floor contemplating my foreigness with shame.

Anyhow, I wrote a blog about the whole Turab recording process, and sneaking into Jerusalem and whatnot, but I didn't feel like posting more whining about freedom of movement issues. But here is a picture of the recording so that it is duly documented.

2006-01-29T01:25:00.000-08:00

From today's Haaretz:

Officials in Brussels are admitting to the first signs of panic.

"Our Middle East experts are running around like headless chickens," is how one EU official described the atmosphere in The Daily Telegraph.

I don't know why, but this pleases me. Anyhow, I think they were elected on the basis of a huge fuck you to Fatah and Israel and the world rather than for their particular Islamic program. For instance, T was an election monitor for one of the parties in a christian section of Ramallah, and even there, Hamas got the vast majority. So the christians were voting for Hamas. T said that even the Hamas people he was monitoring with were totally shocked. Sometimes I really admire the Palestinians for their ability to just flip off the rest of the world in the full knowledge that they will suffer more for it. Maybe that's what resistance is in the end.

2006-01-29T00:57:00.000-08:00

Potentially my new boss? Could be. My organization perhaps ceased to exist yesterday and we are being fully absorbed into the Ministry of Planning. Don't know yet who the minister will be. Hope its not this guy-- this is from the Haaretz today:

"Abu Tir said that the first act of the newly elected Palestinian Legislative Council would be the introduction of sharia as a source for legislation."

The Sharia *is* a source of legislation already according to the Basic Law. Hope the new government reads the frikken laws before they take over.

2006-01-28T01:40:00.000-08:00

I'm writing a 3-year plan for my organization (again). But it seems even more abstract than normal, writing about creating the enabling factors supporting children's rights. Under Hamas? It was weird enough writing this stuff when there was just the occupation to contend with (and a resistent non-progressive Fatah). It all just makes me want to go back to bed, or become a professional bassist.

2006-01-26T05:44:00.000-08:00

I think its worth repeating: AIGH! My minister has already been described in the press as outgoing. My Ministry is going to be run by Hamas. AIGH! And-- on top of that, I was supposed to introduce some French people to Ramallah's club scene tonight, and what if there is no more club scene now that Ramallah's all Hamas-y? I'm going to look all dumb in front of the French. But more importantly: AIGH!

2006-01-26T01:30:00.000-08:00

starting to panic

2006-01-26T00:51:00.000-08:00

"Unofficial results in the elections for the Palestinian Legislative Council indicate a crushing victory for Hamas, which seems to have won an absolute majority in parliament after capturing almost every constituency in the vote." [Haaretz]

jesus-- here we go.

2006-01-25T22:38:00.000-08:00

Elections for the legislative council were yesterday. After polls closed, Ramallah had what one of my friends identified as a "festive atmosphere." For those of us sitting in the bar, it certainly was. Much beer was drunk with the idea that these may be some of our last few beers in the country before Hamas takes over and outlaws it. Meanwhile, groups of cars drove by honking and shooting, and we leaned out the windows to see which parties were claiming victory and raising our beer glasses to Hamas. I'm now at work waiting for 9am to roll around when there should be a press conference with preliminary results. Its weird that this election may affect my work and life more than any other I have experienced-- and I couldn't even vote!

2006-01-24T02:38:00.000-08:00

Trying to ease myself back into this blogging thing. But wicked busy and whatnot. Anyhow, tomorrow there are elections for the Palestinian Legislative Council. Even in Ramallah it looks like Hamas is going to do pretty well. I'm trying not to think about it too much-- could signify disaster on all levels (affecting my ability to enjoy my nightly beer as well as my organization's ability to amend the child law) or it could just more of the same. Anyhow, I get the day off, which is good. But I'm substitute teaching bass to refugee kids. So not totally a day off.

2005-11-28T03:02:00.000-08:00

My roomate got deported from the Israeli airport after being held for 5 days incommunicado. So depressing. She's going to try again in 3 months.

2005-11-26T01:50:00.000-08:00

J, S and I managed to throw a relatively competent Thanksgiving complete with two [2] turkeys. The three of us were the only Americans present, and otherwise we had much of Europe and of course Palestine well represented. I was asked to tell the Thanksgiving story and realized I had only a vague idea of what it is, except that it all ended badly for the non-settlers. Which then made the whole thing awkward, with the settler parallel and whatnot. But we managed to distract the guests with ridiculous amounts of food and wine. Of course the evening degenerated into a live concert. My bass was in Jerusalem, but I was able to produce from my bedroom an 'oud, tabla, dahoulah and mazhar. Not bad. Instant band. I'm pretty sure the neighbors hate me now.

2005-11-23T03:46:00.000-08:00

If there is anything more depressing than the child unit of the ministry of detainees and ex-detainees, I don't know what it is. And would prefer not to.

2005-11-22T04:49:00.000-08:00

Today has been mostly ruined by a unicef annual review, so I might as well whittle away the rest of it blogging uselessly. I took yesterday off for a job interview and for hanging out with S in Jerusalem. This mostly involved running around Jerusalem's labyrinth of an old city in the pouring rain trying to buy a turkey pan. In the end we found a pan that will do and felt very triumphant. We went to check my S's mailbox, and there was a package. It turned out the package was for me from my parents (I don't have my own mailbox). Then it turned out it was full of spices for pumpkin pie. I thought the timing was amazingly perfect as the whole point of the old city escapade was to prepare for the big thanksgiving S and I are planning. I emailed my parents to thank them, and they told me that they had mailed the package in September 2004. The thanksgiving gods smile upon us.

2005-11-14T22:12:00.000-08:00

Today is a holiday. It says in my agenda: "Independence Day, Palestine. 1988: Declaration of Palestinian independence by the 19th PNC in Algiers." This just proves that Palestinians have a wicked sense of humor.

An abbreviated Turab had a concert last night at the opening of a Spanish art exhibition in Jerusalem. We had asked the Spanish Consulate to get permission from the Israeli army for 3 of our members that have West Bank IDs to come to Jerusalem. The Israeli army coordination department called the Consulate just as those of us who were able to come were walking off the stage.

2005-11-06T23:12:00.000-08:00

Ok, now I feel bad. I didn't really mean all that bad stuff I said about civil society. I guess I'm just jealous working for a government that isn't a government.

2005-11-06T01:38:00.000-08:00

I have spent the last 5+ days pretending that I care deeply about civil society. And the truth is, I've been living a lie. And now, my tell-all confessional: I believe that civil society is a load of crap. I get indignant reading responses of civil society stakeholders who whine: the government expects us to follow its laws! boo hoo! The request that we adhere to standards!

Anyhow, its the eid so I've been spending long long work days at my part time job as a consultant at a research center, doing, as you may well have guessed, a project on civil society. Which was due 2 weeks ago. Whatever. There's no one in the office (eid), and its not really my office, so I feel a little jumpy this morning. Lots of strange sounds in the building. Not helped by the fact that I discovered that the Secretariat of the Fatah Revolutionary Counsel is right upstairs. We knocked on their door late the other night because we thought they had parked us in. Polite, but creepy. Also, my window is directly facing the ministry of the interior, which is where all evil in the PNA is seated. Officially. There are always herds of security force boys of some flavor or another wandering around discharging their guns. (kachik kachik). I've lost track of all the different types of security forces since they have regrouped after being pretty much wiped out over the last few years. Now I have to go make lots of graphs on the failure of civil society. Sigh.

2005-10-27T03:40:00.000-07:00

"PM: 'Broad and nonstop' offensive until terror ends" [Haaretz] Uh-oh...

2005-10-25T04:31:00.000-07:00

The Swiss are funding Turab's first CD! Hooray for the Swiss! Hooray for rockstardom!

2005-10-19T03:34:00.000-07:00

From Salon:

"Building like maniacs"
Israel is redrawing its borders inside Palestinian territories to secure all of Jerusalem and put the issue beyond negotiation.

By Chris McGreal

Oct. 18, 2005 | JERUSALEM -- At the northern edge of Jerusalem, on the main road to the Palestinian city of Ramallah, three towering concrete walls are converging around a rapidly built maze of cages, turnstiles and bombproof rooms.

When construction at Qalandiya is completed in the coming weeks, the remaining gaps in the 26-foot (eight-meter) walls will close and those still permitted to travel between the two cities will be channeled through a warren of identity and security checks reminiscent of an international frontier.

The Israeli military built the crossing without fanfare over recent months, along with other similar posts along the length of the vast new "security barrier" that is enveloping Jerusalem, while the world's attention was focused on Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's removal of Jewish settlers from the Gaza Strip.

But these de facto border posts are just one element in a web of construction evidently intended to redraw Israel's borders deep inside the Palestinian territories and secure all of Jerusalem as Israel's capital, and to do it fast so as to put the whole issue beyond negotiation. As foreign leaders, including Tony Blair, praised Sharon for his "courage" in pulling out of Gaza last month, Israel was accelerating construction of the West Bank barrier, expropriating more land in the West Bank than it was surrendering in Gaza, and building thousands of new homes in Jewish settlements.

"It's a trade-off: the Gaza Strip for the settlement blocks; the Gaza Strip for Palestinian land; the Gaza Strip for unilaterally imposing borders," said Dror Etkes, director of the Israeli organization Settlement Watch. "They don't know how long they've got. That's why they're building like maniacs."

At the core of the strategy is the 420-mile West Bank barrier, which many Israeli politicians regard as marking out a future border. Its route carves out large areas for expansion of the main Jewish settlements of Ariel, Maale Adumim and Gush Etzion, and expropriates swaths of Palestinian land by separating it from its owners.

In parallel, new building on Jewish settlements during the first quarter of this year rose by 83 percent over the same period in 2004. About 4,000 homes are under construction in Israel's West Bank colonies, with thousands more homes approved in the Ariel and Maale Adumim blocks, which penetrate deep into the occupied territories. The total number of settlers has risen again this year -- with an estimated 14,000 moving to the West Bank, compared with 8,500 forced to leave Gaza.

Israel is also continuing to expand the amount of territory it intends to retain. In July alone, it seized more land in the West Bank than it surrendered in Gaza: It withdrew from about 19 square miles of territory while sealing off 23 square miles of the West Bank around Maale Adumim.

Israel's strategy is to "strengthen the control over areas which will constitute an inseparable part of the state of Israel," the prime minister said after the Gaza pullout. Last month, he told a meeting of his Likud Party allies that it was important to expand the settlements without drawing the world's attention. "There's no need to talk. We need to build, and we're building without talking," he said. A few days later, one of the prime minister's senior advisors, Eyal Arad, publicly advocated "a strategy of unilaterally determining the permanent borders of the state of Israel."

The greatest impact of recent Israeli actions has been in and around Jerusalem, as Israel stepped up construction of the wall along the most controversial part of its route.

"What we are seeing is an acceleration of construction of the barrier," said David Shearer, head of the United Nations' Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs in Jerusalem. "Because of the barrier, Jerusalem is being sealed off from the rest of the West Bank. Movement in Jerusalem will be with a magnetic card and a sophisticated system of gates. The access the Palestinians have enjoyed to their places of worship, to some of the best schools, to hospitals, is now going to be severely restricted."

The concrete wall through Jerusalem carves out Arab enclaves in the city, restricts the growth of non-Jewish neighborhoods and separates some 200,000 Palestinian residents from the occupied territories.

East Jerusalem will be further isolated from the rest of the West Bank by moves to link the city with the Maale Adumim settlement, using the barrier to mark out a boundary. The effect will be to entirely surround the Arab areas of Jerusalem with large Jewish neighborhoods and to push Israel's frontier almost halfway across the West Bank, virtually severing the north and south of the Palestinian territory at its narrowest point.

Organizations such as the International Crisis Group say it could have potentially explosive consequences. "Current policies in and around the city will vastly complicate, and perhaps doom, future attempts to resolve the conflict by both preventing the establishment of a viable Palestinian capital in Arab East Jerusalem and obstructing the territorial contiguity of a Palestinian state," it said in a recent report.

"The measures currently being implemented are at war with any viable two-state solution and will not bolster Israel's safety; in fact, they will undermine it, weakening Palestinian pragmatists, incorporating hundreds of thousands of Palestinians on the Israeli side of the fence, and sowing the seeds of growing radicalization."

In recent years, both sides have generally accepted that a negotiated agreement would leave the main settlement blocks close to Jerusalem in Israeli hands. Last year, President Bush wrote to Sharon assuring him that Israel would not be expected to return to the 1967 borders "in light of new realities on the ground, including already existing major Israeli population centers."

But Daniel Seidemann, an Israeli lawyer fighting legal cases over the barrier, said the government has worked to make those realities on the ground as extensive as possible while foreign governments shied away from criticism of Sharon for fear of jeopardizing the Gaza pullout. "It's clear what's happening. It's clear the wall is used to designate the border that Sharon thinks he can get with the Americans," he said.

Sharon appears to be counting on continued silence from America and European capitals because he faces a general election next year that Washington would like to see him win over his main challenger on the far right, Benjamin Netanyahu.

The Palestinian leadership believes Sharon has little incentive to negotiate because the Palestinians will not agree to surrender their claim to East Jerusalem or the large areas of land he wants to annex.

But Yossi Beilin, a former Israeli cabinet minister and a peace negotiator, said that a lack of pressure from Washington and other members of the quartet overseeing the "road map" peace plan leaves Sharon free to redraw Israel's borders.

"The commitment to the road map is a big joke. It's hot air all the time," Beilin said. "I'm very pessimistic. I see the big gap between the speeches -- how high the road map is on the agenda and how foreign governments say they have to deal with it -- and nothing is happening on the ground. Nothing. Sharon just does what he wants."

This article has been provided by the Guardian through a special arrangement with Salon. © Guardian Newspapers Limited 2005.

2005-10-18T23:28:00.000-07:00

Today as I was walking to work, it started raining. Hooray hooray! First rain since April. Very appreciated.

Last night was a lovely concert by an American bassist, who turns out to be the teacher of my first bass teacher. Actually I had heard of him since I started bass, but had never met him. Strange who ends up in Ramallah. He told stories while accompanying himself on the bass-- in Arabic-- which he had memorized phonetically. It was very impressive and entertaining. The best was one he just wrote (in English)about lion statues that stand in the center of Ramallah. I've had the refrain stuck in my head all day (and one of them wears a wristwatch...a writstwatch...a wristwatch). We went out for beer afterwards and talked about all things bass and people from the past that we both know. It was lovely, but I'm a bit groggy this morning. And nostalgic.

Turab has a concert in Bethlehem tomorrow. I'm worried because Bethlehem is really had to get into right now. I don't know how the band is going to get there.

2005-10-18T04:56:00.000-07:00

of course it is nice to live somewhere where its normal to get delayed going from meeting to meeting by obstinate sheep in the road.

2005-10-17T02:24:00.000-07:00

Things are really fulfilling and all that, but, god, I'm missing so much good tv.

2005-10-13T01:52:00.000-07:00

If there is anything better than having an assistant, I don't know what it is. We have started the child protection mapping project (finally), so I'm trying to collect all relevent written policies from ministries, UNRWA, NGOs and the police (hate the police). So far success rate is low. Its still unclear whether that's because there are no written policies/guidelines/procedures/by-laws, which is disturbingly possible, or because they just don't want to give them to us. Things are made more difficult today because many offices are empty as it is nearly impossible to come to Ramallah from Jerusalem today. There are roadblocks all over Jerusalem because of the Yom Kippour holiday tomorrow.

Amazing-- the police just called us back and said they do have policies and we can have a copy on Saturday. I'm shocked.

1) They called us back
2) Policies exist
3) We can just have them

When my house was robbed and I needed a copy of the police report to try to collect on insurance, I spent an entire day going from police station to police station. I even had to go to a judge to get him to sign a piece of paper saying the police could give me the police report. It was bureaucracy like I have never experienced before. And I was skeptical this morning when none of the police that we normally deal with knew anything and suggested we call 100 (the local version of 911). Of course when we called, no one answered. But now-- I don't know, maybe I have to rethink my whole deep contempt for the Palestinian Policing institution. Or maybe I'll wait until they find my frikken bass.

2005-10-07T23:32:00.000-07:00

I was reminded last night of what should be my most important rule here-- always be polite to the soldiers when traveling through the West Bank at night. Yalalaan had a concert in Bethleham last night. Bethleham and Ramallah are very close, but most of the band can't go through Jerusalem because it is illegal for them, so we had to go through Wadi Nar (Hell Valley) to get there and back. I like Wadi Nar-- its beautiful and dramatic, but it has a very bad checkpoint called The Container. Its my favorite checkpoint name-- so blunt and honest, and with that sort of Cold War ring to it. I was of course traveling with bass, which is never pleasant. When we got to the container, we had to wait a half hour before going through for no given reason. There were no other cars there, but the soldiers made us wait anyhow. When we finally got up to the soldiers, they made us stop and started giggling about the bass. I established with the soldiers that the bass belonged to me and I was an american and I didn't feel like chatting about where exactly in America I'm from. Then they asked me to open the bass. I've had to play for soldiers at checkpoints before, so I muttered a too audible "fuck". I opened the bottom of the case, and the soldier started knocking hard on the wood. I asked him could he please not do that, and he said I'm checking it-- have you heard of checking? (knock knock knock) And I said, right, but can you not hit it? (knock knock knock) Would you stop? And then he said, ok, pull over. And I was like Shit (this time sotto vocce). And all the band was like, shit. The soldiers talked to each other and T heard them say "she said fuck", so T very helpfully offered She didn't say Fuck, she said Suck. Which at the time seemed pathetic, but now seem hillarious. So then the soldier came to the window, and I did my best to fix things. Look, he said, I'm from America. Oh? Where? I said, and then looked knowing and approving when he said LA, as though that makes everything understandable and good. (him) And I came here to bring security. And this is a security area, and if you are in a security area and you talk to a commander like that, then you'll see what happens. (me) I'm so so sorry! Really, its just that I'm tired, I didn't know how it works here. (him) look at them (my palestinian bandmates) They know. And indeed they did know-- we were all cowed by then. Then he let us go because he felt that I had kowtowed enough to his immense, divine authority. I felt really bad because it could have been a horrible night for us all, and I had acted stupidly. But somehow my healthy fear of soldiers has been replaced with rage and a strong feeling of put down your gun little man, and I'll kick your ass. Which is fine if I'm traveling alone, but not good to subject others to.

2005-10-05T04:57:00.000-07:00

Ramadan also means sitting in bars drinking beer out of teacups looking around the room at all the other people drinking beer out of teacups and feeling completely not sneaky and potentially hell-bound.

2005-10-03T23:03:00.000-07:00

I'm back in the holy land, secure in the knowledge that 3 days is certainly not enough time to spend in Cairo. I think Cairo is hands-down my favorite city to visit, but I still feel pretty sure that I wouldn't like living there. So why do I keep applying for jobs there? Anyhow, for anyone that hasn't gone, you must. And eat the pigeons.

I had no problems entering the airport at Tel Aviv, but I strongly recommend against ever flying El Al. When I was leaving Egypt, I went to the airport with 1 half empty small backpack, 1 large drum and a mostly empty handbag. The airline security spent 4 hours (the plane was delayed) going through these things. In the end they determined that the then completely empty backpack and the also empty case for the drum were extremely dangerous. Not only could I not take them as carry-on, but they had to be stowed in a special (cardboard) security box. This, of course, left the issue of what to do with all the stuff that had been in the bags. The drum I was allowed to take, bagless, on the plane. The other crap got its own cardboard box. I asked whether 2 boxes could then be consolidated so that I only had to find one on arrival, and they had no problem with this. So then all my stuff was put in 1 cardboard box with my empty backpack, raising the question of why I couldn't have just checked the backpack in the first place.

Today is the first day of Ramadan, which means the start of a month of feeling guilty about eating and lots of sneaking around to manage snacks. It is also the start of my intensive concert season. Three concerts this week alone. Kul Am Wa Intum Bakheer.

2005-09-28T22:31:00.000-07:00

Going to Egypt for 3 days-- hooray hooray. At least hopefully for 3 days. That's up to Israeli immigration as always. Anyhow, I have a letter from the head of the UNICEF mission here saying please please let her back in or Palestinian child protection services and policies will never be properly mapped! And that clearly means doom for all of humanity! It doesn't really say that, but it does carry a certain tone of desperation. Anyhow, I don't know if the letter will help my case, or if its better to just pretend to be a failing musician in Tel Aviv like I always do. And this time it may be extra convincing as I have been asked to purchase while in Egypt 1 Dahouli (large drum), 1 Eastern Accordian and 1 set of nays (flute-like things). Its hard to relax and enjoy vacation when I spend the whole time imagining myself in the line at the passport both at Ben Gurion Airport, shaking. But I'm sure Cairo will immediately do its trick, and my hotel balcony overlooking the Nile will be properly napped upon.

2005-09-25T22:34:00.000-07:00

A truck carrying weapons for show blew up during a Hamas demonstration on Friday in Gaza, killing 20. Maybe such outlandish stupidity and disregard for lives will change the way people view Hamas. Its still too soon to tell. Of course Hamas is blaiming Israel, but at least here, no one is buying it. There was a strike in Ramallah Saturday to commemorate the victims, as well as large demonstrations-- but I wasn't really able to get a sense of what these demonstrations were for or against. I probably should have tried harder.

Meanwhile, as part of the whimsically named "First Rains" military operation, Israeli F-16s or helicopters (not clear from the media) blew up an elementary school in Gaza. I've just done a search on Google News and have found almost no commentary on this. The most extensive reporting was on Al Jazeera which stated that 20 Pakistanis were wounded in the attack. Even Al Jazeera can't keep Palestine and Pakistan straight? And why isn't a missle attack completely destroying an elementary school newsworthy except in the local press?

2005-09-19T03:44:00.000-07:00

If you are my mother, please stop reading here or I am not responsible for any worry that this post might cause.

Experiencing some minor rule of law issues in Ramallah these days. On Thursday, a bar (Almonds) which was having a dance party was shot up and cars outside set on fire by young men (donkeys) who had not been allowed in. No one was hurt, but I suspect that will be the end of Almonds' summer party season. For the best-- they were getting quite dull. And there was another shoot out on Saturday between the different branches of the security forces, or between the security forces and the police. I'm not exactly sure. But most disturbing is what went on last week in Taybeh (a village I described in an earlier post). A Muslim woman from a neighboring village was having an affair with a Christian man from Taybeh. Her family killed her and then a mob went and burned a great number of houses in Taybeh. Luckily, security forces arrived in time to prevent the brewery from being torched (praise God!), but everyone is questioning why it took so long for them to arrive (takes a long long time to set stone houses on fire). This is very worrying as it seems to be Muslim versus Christian. Bad bad bad. And strange.

2005-09-16T22:43:00.000-07:00

Ok Justice Aharon Barak is officially on my shit list:

"As opposed to the ruling of the International Court of Justice in The Hague, the High Court ruled that the state does have the authority to build the fence in the West Bank, and was under no obligation to move it to within the Green Line. It determined that the fence could protect the settlements and not just the area within the Green Line, and that it could serve to connect settlements to Israel." [Haaretz]

It seems the Israeli high court is in desperate need of a crash course in elementary international humanitarian law.

But, despite the occupation, there is still much fun to be had here. I spent yesterday under an olive tree in an ancient olive grove in Birzeit village with the other musicians from Yalalaan. We had a barbeque, played and sang and ate figs. West Bank living isn't so bad. Yalalaan had a concert on Thursday at the Cultural Palace, and in honor of our achievements there we have decided to rename the group Nashaaz (out of tune).

2005-09-14T22:51:00.000-07:00

I really really wish I was in Gaza right now. I can't believe that the Israeli army just left the border with Egypt. After all these years, and all these deaths and house demolitions, and they just left. Just like that. After justifying bulldozing entire neighborhoods to protect the border, they just up and left. I know that it is nonesensical to ask such questions, but I can't help it-- What was it all for?

Meanwhile, its impossible to imagine being a Gazan from Rafa who has been encaged for perhaps a whole lifetime, and suddenly able to just stroll on over to Egypt. In the media they keep talking about people reuniting with their families (the city of Rafa is actually on both sides of the border), but there also has been a lot of mention of people running across the border to buy cigarettes and cheese. Cheese? 38 years and they go to buy cheese?

But my favorite thing is this:
They just went and blew a hole in the wall along the border. I've only lived here on and off for 5 years, but nonetheless, after all the checkpoints, closures, barriers-- the sight of a blown-up wall makes me giddy. Freedom is finally on the march! Cheese is a short stroll away!

2005-09-14T04:55:00.000-07:00

Not much happening here. Gaza is apparently free. The Arabic press is using the word "liberated." Which is even stronger than the "withdrawing" they've been talking about. I want to try to go to a OCHA security briefing to find out what's actually happening. Meanwhile, rumors abound-- of course. I heard last night that eight Palestinians from Rafah, which is a city/camp in S. Gaza (otherwise known as hell on earth) drowned during their first trip to the shore, which they are finally able to visit. The irony was lost on no one. But Gaza is far away from the West Bank in every sense except geographical, and getting further every year. I am working on a study for a research center, and one question asked what type of people they would not like as neighbors, and respondents wrote in "Gazans." I haven't visited there since 2002, and hope to go soon, work visa permitting.

In other news, Turab has a website http://www.turab.ps

And finally, I'd like to send a shout out to my dad, who is in Gulf Port right now helping in the relief effort. I'm very proud.

2005-09-09T22:43:00.000-07:00

People keep asking me if there's any fall-out from the Mussa Arafat assassination where I am. Nope. There has been a fair amount of shooting at night, but that's normal for wedding season.

My boss, on behalf of the PA, is offering assistance to America in terms of a psychosocial team to help with the mental health problems of the children victims of Katrina. The idea being that Palestinian psychosocial workers have long experience with traumatized kiddies. It is, of course, also a political gesture. But she has the team all ready to go, and backing from the World Bank and American Consulate. She said that she would train us so me and J would be on the team, but I am seriously unqualified, feel a little iffy about the political aspect, and mentally un-equipt to see first hand the horrors that these people have been through.

She also said something about trying to get Turab to play when the president makes his next big speech. Sort of hard to imagine.

2005-09-04T22:28:00.000-07:00

Went to Jerusalem yesterday with T for a meeting. Qalandia checkpoint is unrecognizable. Its shocking how quickly things change. The wall suddenly extends all the way across the roads used to get in and out of Ramallah, and another road has appeared going another direction. I don't know where. There is another part of the wall on the other side of Qalandia too-- and I'm not clear on how it all fits together. The new "terminal" which will process people in and out of Qalandia is nearly finished it seems. Its all terribly permenant. Meanwhile, T has a West Bank ID, which of course makes it illegal to go to Jerusalem. He can however pass through Qalandia legally-- go figure. We were both curious to know as we were taking a taxi on the other side when exactly he becomes illegal. He surmised that anywhere where there is lots of trash and dirt, he's free to go.

2005-08-31T02:16:00.000-07:00

I've just realized that I live in an NGO police state. Its so weird. I got a call this morning on my new mobile-- the number of which even I don't know--from someone in Mustafa Barghouthi's office (former presidential candidate (20%!), former boss) asking why I had protested Daniel Barenboim's recent concert here. Background: Barenboim conducted a concert by an orchestra made up of players from Europe, Syria, Lebanon and Israel. The Israeli players were former soldiers (which is of course true of most of Israel's population as military service is manditory). Barenboim has done a lot for music in Ramallah-- playing concerts, starting a youth orchestra and donating a steinway. However, my friend A was convinced that this concert was something different. It's different to bring a "co-existence" orchestra to play in Ramallah when it is still forbidden for Palestinians to go to (let alone hold a concert in) Tel Aviv. At first I advised A to pick his battles, but then I gradually bought into his idea that there needs to be protest against attempts to normalize the situation while Palestinians still don't have their basic rights. I wasn't convinced enough to actually go protest, but I was proud of his efforts and I chose not to attend the concert. The concert had been organized by Mustafa, who had it seems strong-armed the various local cultural centers into agreeing. One center in particular raised concerns, to which Mustafa said "There are no protests in Palestine that I don't start." I was of course not at the meeting to hear this, so I can't confirm-- scary if true.

Anyhow, in the end the protest didn't happen because not enough protesters showed up. And then this morning, 2 weeks later, I get a call asking about my participation. I knew the woman who called from my days at Medical Relief and we had a friendly chat during which she asked who the leaders of the whole thing were. I told her A, because I thought he would like the chance for a good discussion on the matter since the protest hadn't happened. Then, immediately afterwards I thought I had made a terrible mistake and called A to tell him. He was fine with the whole thing, but somehow I still feel like an informant. I'm also concerned about having "crossed" Mustafa (even if in actual fact I never even went to the protest) because he controls so much in this town. I was just emailing my boss about the whole thing because I thought she would be amused. I asked her Do you ever feel like you live in an NGO-police state? And she respondend The police state could learn a lot from NGOs.

This place is so weird. Government too weak to form a proper police state, so the NGOs have to pick up the slack.

2005-08-28T23:42:00.000-07:00

This is my band, Turab. It means "dirt", but in a poetic sense. We are trying to get money to become rock stars. So far, the Swiss government seems interested-- and they may even have approved our proposal to produce a CD, but they won't tell us. This is what our proposal says:

Turab was started in 2004 by a group of six musicians residing in Jerusalem and Ramallah. The idea for the band developed in response to the lack of instrumental groups playing modern Palestinian music. While other aspects of the Palestinian cultural scene has received widespread support (such as cinema and theater), Palestinian instrumental and lyrical music has been largely sidelined. The musicians brought with them different musical backgrounds—from Western Classical to Arabic Classical—which have fused to develop a new sound supporting the contemporary lyrics of local poets.

The lyrics to all the songs have been adapted from original writings by various contemporary Palestinian poets. The featured poets and writers include:

Hussein El Bargouthi: The late Hussein El Bargouthi is one of the greatest contemporary Palestinian writers/poets. The title track of the CD is from Bargouthi’s poem “Lamma El Leil.”
Samer El Salhi: a writer from Ramallah, wrote “Hada Leil,” “Mahmud,” and “Umro Qaseer.” These pieces were all written during the April 2002 invasion of Ramallah. They were read to the composer over the phone during the prolonged curfews and electricity outages of the invasion.
Mahmud Abu Hashhash: wrote two of the songs on the CD; “Sha`rek Dahab” and “Had El Umor.” “Had El Umor” talks about the increasing hardships of the Palestinian people resulting from curfews, invasions, closure, and the Separation Wall. “Sha`rek Dahab” is a love story told within the context of the Palestinian situation.
Muhammad Ata: wrote “Bab il-Balad.” The story behind this piece is based on Muhammad Ata’s attempt to travel. He was prevented by the Israeli Government, and upon his return to Ramallah, Mahmud Abu Hashash sent him the poem “Had El Umor,” which talks about the difficulties in traveling. Muhammad Ata wrote “Bab Il-Balad” as a response to Abu Hashash’s piece.

This is my favorite song:

Tafran
Khaled Sukkar

The workers are broke
Disgusted with themselves, so vulnerable
Generous God will solve it
And we will pay the store’s bills
Hierarchy will make the situation
Go forward with high quality
With reform and financial administration
It will be amended ya Abu Flan
We have no corruption
No corrupted people nor cheaters
The economy is improving
And the situation is completely safe
We did everything we wanted
We ask God to stop the evil of the envious
Work and labor and toil

We ask God for mercy for the days of corruption

2005-08-27T03:19:00.000-07:00

Anyone want to manage a band? Anyone?

2005-08-22T22:45:00.000-07:00

I don't really have any disengagement news to report, so here are some pictures of my neighborhood. I live in the old city (Ramallah Tahta). The specific area where my building sits is called Button el-Howwa which means "stomach of the wind." The sunset view is from my window. On clear days, I can see Tel Aviv and the sea. I have plenty of room for visitors.

2005-08-19T22:11:00.000-07:00

News Analysis:

According to Haaretz: "Israel Defense Forces on Friday began digging eight-meter-deep trenches around the evacuated Gush Katif settlements in the Gaza Strip in a bid to prevent Palestinians from reaching the settlement bloc prior to its complete evacuation"

hmmm... I guess it beats my razorwire idea to prevent all the kiddies from running into the settlements and getting all blown up by the mines. Nonetheless, its hard to approve of the IDF digging more trenches around stuff in Palestine. Maybe I should think of it in terms of job creation a la Cool Hand Luke: "What's your dirt doin' in my hole?" I'm sure some kind-hearted donor will fund some unemployed Gazans to fill in the trench and thus end poverty.

And, the darker side of disengagement-- Haaretz article talking about a family living in a house next to one of the Gaza Settlements: "Khalil's family has been locked into its house since Monday. The army arrived that night, Khalil told Haaretz by telephone, and informed him that the entire family would have to remain in the house for the next three weeks. Since then, he said, the family has been penned up in one room, with soldiers standing guard over them. The Red Cross brought water on Wednesday and will bring more today."

2005-08-18T01:10:00.000-07:00

Four Palestinians were shot dead by a settler outside of Ramallah yesterday evening. This is what the front page of the NY Times has to offer on the topic:

For Palestinians, Joy and Some Hints of Sympathy By JAMES BENNETPalestinians watched the forced eviction of Israeli Jews from Gaza with a mix of jubilation and flashes of sympathy.• Audio & Photos Interactive Map: Evictions• Israel Removes Gaza Settlers Last Holdouts• Rice's Reaction Arab View Egypt's Border

which is to say, nothing.

Ramallah is having a strike in order to commemorate the victims. But its only going until 1 this afternoon. It sort of reminds me of the summer of 2002 when the Israelis would put us under curfew, but at odd hours different times every day. Today, as I was driving from the ministry to my office, my taxi driver leaned out the window and asked someone on the street when Ramallah was closed until. The more things change....

Meanwhile, police and security forces congregating. Always interesting when those two groups get together. They like to shoot at each other a lot-- perhaps its a training excersize? Teaching eachother how to duck and run?

2005-08-15T04:40:00.000-07:00

why why why do I live in the Middle East in August? why why why does the PA not invest in airconditioning for its poor, sad, melty civil servants?

2005-08-14T23:59:00.000-07:00

Its DISENGAGEMENT: DAY 1. So far, not too much to report. Probably because I'm not in Gaza or the Northern West Bank. I feel a bit antsy though.

2005-08-13T01:45:00.000-07:00

Went to a hip-hop concert this week. It made me feel old and it made me fall in love with a local group DAM. They are Palestinians from Israel and they are terribly good. Here's an excerpt (translated)

Here I build my home and here you have destroyed my home
And if this is not legal what about yours, my cousin?!.
I’m trying to build a home and what is build for me is found
In – do re mi or will be found in a place with lots
Of people with promises that will be the light at the end of the tunnel
but that is just a bulldozer or another train running over (* a train siren*)
no no in this song there is no censorship
there is a sewerage, railway track, call it architecture
and add to it white pepper
and what will be sneezed from it is a loaded gun
and – all the things I’ve said have been given a voice
and –there are the people who stand in line that
–they have difficulty in their smile and a smile in the difficulty
and as long as this difficulty is within us know that this is a rope too
tangled, “this is not racism, this is Zionism”
enough this is not ignorance this is fortification in ignorance

They were followed by The Patriarch-- a Palestinian American rapper who toured with Emenem. He wasn't as good as DAM, but he had a small emotional breakdown on stage which was entertaining. Had this public crisis about how as a Palestinian he wants to be here, in Ramallah, but he has to be in America man! Its so hard!

Best part of this whole show: The Patriarch starts doing this AND I SAY "TU" AND YOU SAY "PAC" "TU-PAC, TU-PAC" etc. etc. thing. Then DAM comes running back on stage and said in Arabic, ok, now we've commemorated the dead Americans-- lets deal with our dead. "OU ANA BA'OUL GHASSAN OU INTA BT'OUL KHANAFANI" and I say Ghassan and you say Kanafani. Ghassan Kanafani was a Palestinian writer assassinated by Israel in 1972. This is his:

"All thinking must set forth from the point of death, whether it be, as you say, that of a man who dies contemplating the charms of the body of a wonderfully beautiful girl, or whether he dies staring into a newly shaven face which frightens him because of an old wooden box tied round with string. The unsolved question remains that of the end; the question of non-existence, of eternal life - or what? Or what, my dear Ahmed?" (from 'The Death of Bed Number 12', 1961)

2005-08-09T04:26:00.000-07:00

This is my favorite bit of wall art so far

2005-08-08T05:32:00.000-07:00

I just went to my first "disengagement" coordination meeting. Don't know how I've avoided them for so long. And now I'm spooked-- imagining children flooding the settlements after the army leaves them and them getting all blown up by landmines and UXOs. Supposedly the Israeli army is going to clear all that stuff away, but judging from past experience, yeah. we'll see. And in the meanwhile, its scary to think about. So what I think we need now is razorwire.

The whole "disengagement" thing is strange. I'm using quotations because I don't think that's the right word. It would be if the army were leaving etc. etc., but that's not the case. Its the withdrawal of settlers from two parts of Palestine. Which is a good thing as long as it isn't the first step towards consolidating the settlements in the West Bank (which some Israeli government officials have openly stated). Even the Palestinians are using the word insihab, which means withdrawal. During the invasions of 2002, I vowed that I would name my first child Insihab, because I think its a beautiful-sounding word, and because I spent so much time watching Al Jazeera just hoping to hear that word. Now, it seems different, with the word being used to describe such a half-assed phenomenon. Insihab by any other name still smells as sweet?

2005-08-07T22:44:00.000-07:00

Had a concert in Jerusalem Saturday night with a band that plays classical Arabic music. It went well, but was a bit nerve-wracking as almost everyone in the band has West Bank IDs, and its a dangerous time to be caught Palestinian on the wrong side of the wall. Sneaking in went pretty smoothly for them, but on the way back to Ramallah, police were checking everyone at a place where they usually don't. Luckily we saw it in time, and the West Bank ID people got out of the van and walked across while those of us who are "legal" went through with car. But then we realized they were also checking the people on foot too. These days, being caught as a Palestinian outside of the specially-built Palestinian cage can mean serious jail time, so I suffered a minor panic attack watching them slowly approaching the police. But they just sauntered right by, and somehow it was all ok. Meanwhile, W told me that he considered my ability to play Arabic music a gift from God, which is the nicest thing anyone has said to me perhaps all year.

I'm pretty sure its about to do that horrible thing where it rains mud, which is unthinkable as its August and its impossible for it to rain in August. Perhaps its divine commentary on the disengagement...

2005-08-05T22:37:00.000-07:00

So now everyone has to come visit me because I found the coolest village. Taybeh is apparently close to Ramallah, although it took us a long time to get there because we couldn't take the settler roads, so had to use the indirect dirt "Arab" roads. I just love that inanimate objects such as roads can have ethnic identities. Went to Bizentine turned Crusaider turned pile of rubble church, which is still being used by the community today to offer animal sacrifices. I had never really seen that as a Christian tradition, but there you go. So please note in the photo to the right the pool of dried blood in the foreground and the bloody handprints and "Jesus" markings on the wall. Perhaps the weirdest thing is that Jesus is written in English. Why?

Then we went to the Taybeh brewery, which is the only microbrewery in the Middle East. I've been an avid consumer for the past five years, and was quite pleased to find the source. And I did my best to convince the owner that Turab should be the official band of the first Palestinian Octoberfest.

2005-08-04T02:49:00.000-07:00

Introductions. hmmm. Like anyone answering a personal ad ever, I should start with, "well, I'm not really the answering-personals (read 'blogging') type." But here we are. I've been recently inspired by my daily addiction to the happenings at littlemarvelstove and realized how nice it is to have some sort of daily record of what my friend is up to. Especially as I live extremely far away from said friend. Also, there's so much crap I've been forgetting recently that a daily record seems even more useful. I recently had a conversation with a friend who asked if I remembered the first F-16 attack on the city I live in. I didn't. Then he reminded me that it was the night of a friend's going-away party, which helped considerably. But it all goes to show that if I don't start writing crap down...

So to begin with the mundane. Spent my morning in a meeting at the Ministry of Statistics trying despretly to understand the discussion on national domestic violence indicators. This was all very relevent and whatnot-- I just finished writing this book (see right). But it was sort of all a bit too much with the Arabic and whatnot. I slinked (slunk?) out and am now being useless at my desk. Not useless! Blogging! Tomorrow I am going to the village of Taybeh which produces an excellent beer of the same name. They are hosting an Octoberfest in October (which, according to some recently consulted Germans, is completely the wrong time to hold it), and I am going to try to convince them that my band Turab (roughly translates to "dirt," but I'm told has deep poetical meaning) should be the official band of the first Palestinian Octoberfest.